Anne-Louise Depalo

As I practice mindfulness I am becoming ever increasing aware of my surroundings. At church yesterday, I was sitting waiting for Mass to begin. IT was a sunny day, and I was drawn to the stained glass windows of the church. I usually sit in the front pews so I can admire the windows. The sun was brightly shining through the windows. There is a window depicting the Annunciation, that is one my favorites. The morning sun shines in such a way that the light radiating from the angel Gabriel is brilliant and heavenly. How effective the depictions of the Bible and Saints are. I see how important they were in teaching the Parish their faith when not everyone read, or had access to a Bible.
For some reason today I sat in the back, and during the Consecration, I looked up and I saw the stained glass window of Jesus. He was surrounded by lambs, and was holding one in a profound embrace. His gaze followed me. I felt His presence and heard His call.
I have been in St. Ann’s a thousand times and never really “saw” that window before. As I prayed, I envisioned myself as a lamb who Christ was gathering into His care. I heard the lyrics of one of my favorite songs, “Someone to Watch over me”, experiencing it in a new way. It is telling that it was writing by Ira and George Gershwin who were of the Jewish faith. No doubt the song and lyrics were divinely inspired. I do not know why I was surprised; that is how the Holy Spirit works.
The words that always captivated me the most were, “I am the little lamb who is lost in the wood. I know I could always be good to one who’d watch over me.” The someone was staring right at me. He was always there, I just never paid attention. Inspired, I began to really look around the Church. What else was I missing? I stopped at the Tabernacle. Did I really reverence the Blessed Sacrament? The Lamb who sacrificed Himself for me was right there always.
My gaze next went to the Blessed Mother, and I wondered how many times I did not think to ask Her to bring me to Jesus. Then I heard, “Mary had a little lamb His fleece was white as snow, and everywhere that Mary went the Lamb was sure to go.” This was another gentle reminder and whisper of the Holy Spirit. Jesus through Mary. Nursery rhymes were used to teach children the catechism, especially during the Protestant reformation when Catholicism was banned. They were very effective and evidently still are. The Spirit would never allow her to be forgotten, and He reminded me of it once again.
I received so much just by coming to Church earlier than usual, and sitting with the Lord, being ever mindful of His presence.

If mindfulness is focusing one’s awareness on the present moment, while calmly acknowledging and accepting one’s feelings, thoughts, and bodily sensations, I realized I must have the time and space to experience that. Once I do then in that experience I can call for the grace to react or respond appropriately.
It dawned on me that I would never be able to become mindful if I did not change the thinking, attitude, and behaviors which lead me to be unconscious in the first place. I prided myself on being able to multitask. I measured my worth and whether a day was good or bad by how much I accomplished. Our society unfortunately stresses productivity at all costs and I found myself constantly battling time. I was always losing. I did not acknowledge my limitations. Being over booked and overscheduled lead to constant anxiety and I would overreact if things did not go as planned. God help the person driving in front of me doing the speed limit when I had to get to an appointment or meeting.
My prayer time in the morning, saying the rosary, spiritual reading, and even daily mass alone was not going to transform me if I did not change how I lived. Why was being crazy busy such a badge of honor? And how was I going to live without every minute being accounted for?
One of the greatest spiritual writers in the 20th century Henri Nouwen put it best, “As long as you run from where you are and distract yourself you cannot be fully healed. A seed only flourishes by staying on the ground in which it is sown.”
The idea of being a seed that needs to grow struck a chord with me. To be still and let God work in and through me can only be accomplished if I cooperate with Him. I need to make the space for Him.
One of the best places to start was with eating. I had gotten so used to eating while on the phone, sending emails, or shoveling food into my mouth so I could move on to the next item on my agenda. At times I even skipped meals because lack of time which made me less focused and irritable. Food is such a central part of our existence and it is a gift given to us by God. We are body as well as spirit.
Now I make an effort to make time to eat my meals. Every meal starts with a prayer no matter whom I am with or where I am. This sets the tone and helps me relax. I chew thoroughly, experience the texture of the food, and savor every bite. Gratitude overwhelms me. I am thankful for the food as well as for those who prepared it. My husband Mark is the chef of the family and my mindful eating has made me appreciate him even more. It is amazing what you realize when you pay attention.
Meals are served without the television in the background, cell phones are turned off and there is no checking emails or Facebook. It is a time for sharing. Meal time is a time to talk about one’s day or to share a problem or concern. This all leads to greater intimacy and compassion. Instead of making love to a gallon of ice cream unconsciously while watching television have it for dessert at the table and share it in love and delight with your family.
Perhaps Padre Pio had the best advice when he said to say a small blessing after a meal. He said it would put an end to gluttony. I think it may also prevent indigestion. My next intention is to pray after a meal. Now the impulse is to get up and clean right away, and Mark is famous for clearing dishes as soon as they are empty. A prayer may just stop him in his tracks and allow the seed to stay at the table a little longer.

There was a recent article in the American Bar Association Journal about bringing mindfulness into the practice of law. In the article, entitled “Justice Begins with a Breath,” Rhonda V. Magee, a law professor at the University of San Francisco, takes her definition of mindfulness from cognitive science which is comprised of neuroscience, psychology, and other subfields.)

Mindfulness is defined as paying attention, in a particular way, with an attitude of compassionate or friendly nonjudgment, with the intention of increasing one’s capacity in the present moment. She goes on to say that mindfulness can increase ethical lawyers and pave the way for better interrelationships and social justice. I was not surprised to learn that Professor Magee was raised in a Christian family with a devout Grandmother who had a major impact on her life.

I however would have entitled the article, “Justice Begins with a Prayer.” Taking a breath can calm your mind and slow your body down, but we are also made of spirit. Just taking a breath does not go far enough. To engage the spirit, one must pray. Prayer is having a conversation with God. In order to live fully and remain in the present moment, we must call upon God to guide, direct and sustain us. For this reason, it would benefit the cognitive sciences in their study of mindfulness to include theology in their subfields.

This idea of mindfulness has been resonating with me both personally and professionally. I am a family lawyer who has been a certified mediator for over 20 years, and a collaborative attorney for over 5 years. Since committing to the Catholic faith eight years ago, my personal life and professional life have shifted greatly. I have learned through God’s grace, that the Catholic faith calls us to incorporate what Christ and the Church teach us into our daily lives; our work lives, our family life, and our communities. This ongoing process and transformation is what St. Ignatius calls living a life of conversion.

I liken it to an earthquake that has opened the earth under my feet and I am now exploring the cracks. I have experienced the peace of Christ and I desire to be an instrument of His peace in the world and share that peace with others. It is the meaning of Pax Christi. St. Augustine defined peace as the tranquility of order and which is the work of justice and charity. This is what all lawyers are called to do. So I am determined to be mindful and truly live each moment. I wish to share my moments with you in this journey, and hope you will find peace as well.

Perhaps Blessed Mother Teresa captured mindfulness the best when she said, “Be happy in the moment, that’s enough. Each moment is all we need not more.”

ABA Journal January 2016 “Justice Begins with a Breath” by Rhonda V. Magee at p.24
ABA Journal January 2016 “Justice Begins with a Breath” by Rhonda V. Magee at p. 24

St Augustine said,” The world is a book and those who do not travel read only a page.” Perhaps that is the reason I loved to travel so.  I was always a veracious reader but for many years I was traveling not knowing where I was traveling to or why. That has since changed as every trip brings me closer to my purpose.   I am a pilgrim.

A pilgrim is defined as a traveler who journeys to a foreign land or to a holy place.  I realize I am a pilgrim. We are all on journeys of our own; as they say life is a journey not a destination.  And as we journey on we grow with experience and wisdom. Hopefully, we learn from our mistakes and rejoice in our success.  A pilgrim’s purpose  is to transcend this life and return  home. Home to the One who made us and lives within each one of us. That is the destination. This is not an easy road. It is full of bumps and detours as well as heartaches and disappointments. Pilgrimages in whatever form they take whether it is nature, a holy shrine or a museum filled with art and treasure whether it is a visit for a day or two weeks helps us stay focused in the journey.

Pilgrimages and travel has helped me to get out of myself. To have the time to stop, see and listen. Time to get out of the routine and recapture awe and wonder. I see myself as being a crusader in search of the divine. No where is this better experienced then on a religious pilgrimage or retreat. When we seek the divine we are not only growing closer to it but we are becoming more like we were meant to be. We experience the beauty and grace of God. It renews and enriches us strengthens our faith and gets us back on track. After a pilgrimage I am able to embrace my life as it is and continue on this trek of change, growth, and true conversion.I return with a renewed sense of purpose and try to bring my experience to others. I also meditate and contemplate the places I have been. It aids my prayer life and in times of spiritual  dryness or discouragement I call on these memories and they sustain me. They also help my marriage as I recall the times Mark and I spent together when the doldrums or challenges of married life set in. We all need romance and love.

I have also been enriched by the people I have met along the way and have developed many soul friendships. I have learned to not be myopic in my vision and idea of the world and  all the cultures and religions that embrace it. It has helped me see the face of Christ in everyone. This is why I have decided to write this blog. I will discuss where I go, where I have been,  and how you too can experience some of the pages of life.

So I invite you to pick up this book and begin reading.